Thoughts of a squirrel

Place: Strip mall in a middle upper class area. Directly across from the mall.

I worked in a strip store for about a year that was placed square in the middle of a middle to upper class area. Most would think that being there that long, you would get used to the people but they still fascinate me.

Our parking lot was…inconvenient, to say the least. It was definitely not a well thought out design. It was more like they let a five year old with a tonka truck decide what would be the best way to cause the biggest pileup of all his little hot wheels cars. But you learn from your mistakes and we learned to deal with the tiny constrictions and so did most of our customers. There were often times where there were near misses with accidents and few minor fender benders. Which, if nothing else, provided entertainment for us employees. After watching someone nearly hit a rather expensive looking sedan and giggling to myself that they probably were some jerk who deserved it, a disgruntled woman comes rushing into the store.

M: Hi is there any-

C: Is that your parking lot?

M: (following where she is pointing) Well yes, we use that lot.

C: So it is YOUR lot?!

M: Well, we use it, so I suppose so…yes.

C: Well you need to do something about it.

M: Umm…excuse me?

C You need to put in another stop sign. Or a speed bump. Or fix the layout, it’s dangerous!!

M: You want us to…fix the lot? I’m sorry ma’am but that’s up to the landlord. Not the stores in the strip center.

C: well you just told me this was your parking lot!

M: I’m sorry for the misunderstanding ma’am. But I told you that we use the lot. We don’t actually own that lot. Just use it.

C: Well you need to fix it. It’s dangerous! (Stomps out of store)

She never actually went to any of the stores in our strip so I’m not entirely sure what even brought the woman into the lot in the first place. I will never understand why the people in that area with money always thought they were entitled. I prefer the Bears players that used to come in, and despite me asking for an autograph, they were never stuck up, let alone remotely rude.

Place: Your average tourist trap suburban mall.

Since they changed our dress code, we do get a few more questions as to if we are actually in fact employees. But this was just ridiculous.

The mall that I worked at was full of tourists and navy guys since we were so close to the naval base. So it was fairly normal for people to come up to us and ask if we worked there, especially if our back was originally to them simply because lets be honest. We do look like customers as well. This particular day had been fairly uneventful, tasks to finish but not much else. I was behind the counter filing away some paperwork when someone comes up to the counter and waits a moment.

Me: Hi! Can I help you?

Customer: (after looking down at my name tag) Hi, do you work here?

Me: (I look down at my name tag as well) Umm….yes. Can I help you?

Customer: I just wanted someone to help me find game?

Me: (still unsure if this person believes that I actually am an employee) Yeah, It’s right over here.

I continue the transaction without any other snags. But the entire time I can’t help but wonder if this person believes me or not. And I can’t help but wonder how this whole thing would have gone if I had told the customer after asking if I worked there, to hang on I’ll go find someone who does. Then spun around in a circle, pointed at my name tag and said “I hear you needed some help?” Because I clearly am just some crazy person who enjoys running around the mall wearing name tags and standing behind store counters.

A squirrels life doesn’t have to revolve around nuts. Sometimes it revolves around distractions and ridiculousness. I’m a twenty something with a distraction problem, hence the nickname squirrel. I’m also one of those elusive females working in the video game industry. One of my biggest goals in life is to become a full time artist and get into designing concept art for the video games that I sell. But in the meantime retail does the job. Sort of. Working in the retail world has definitely taught me a lot. People’s IQ drops during the holiday season, the absurdities of the human population, that you can find some of your best friends in the strangest places, the insanity that is being an average girl in a predominantly male environment and sometimes it’s the nuts that find the squirrel.